So – when we move to the new house in August, Emeline will have a decent sized portion of the basement for ALL of her toys and stuff. This makes me happier than I can even get into. Finally, her bedroom will be just that – her bedroom. There will be books and a few dolls/animals, but it will mostly be just her bedroom for sleeping or daydreaming or whatever. All of her playthings will be in the basement. The awesome thing is also that her section of the basement is right next to the family room area where the television and sofa will be (which is next to the gaming area, which is next to the Nerd Hole. I promise there will be pictures.) So basically, whether we’re watching TV, gaming, or playing on the computer, the family will be all together! It will be awesome and I can’t wait. Emeline’s Side also has an 8-foot by 6-foot chalkboard along the back wall and one of the sidewalls is a corkboard. Lots of room for drawing and displaying of artwork. She’ll have her Little Tykes table and chairs there, as well as a number of cheap Ikea toy boxes for her toys. There will also be a little cubby shelf with labeled drawers for her art supplies and smaller toys. There is a closet for the larger stuff and for shoving things into when cleaning really fast.

There is a point to all of this besides just laying out the floor plan of the new basement.

I want to put my old kitchen play set in there and for whatever reason, the thought popped into my mind, “Are you encouraging pretend play or perpetuating a stereotype?” I am inclined to think the former. Joe and I share in the cooking duties, with him doing the majority of it when I am in school. She helps him cook just as often as she helps me cook and I think her having a kitchen of her own to play in would be awesome for her. And yet, a very small, and somewhat annoying voice in my head says, “She’ll think she HAS to cook cause she’s a GIRL!” Which couldn’t be further from the truth. I know that when I played in my kitchen set, it wasn’t with a sense of female epicurean duty, but with a sense of “What can I sneak out of the kitchen, mix up down here, and try to poison my little brother with? Oatmeal, mayonnaise, and mustard? AWESOME!”

So I wonder how much negative perpetuation of a plaything is inherent and how much is learned? Meaning – unless I tell her that because she is a female she needs to learn how to cook because the men in her life will be unable to feed themselves without her will she think that’s what her play set is for, or will she just play with the darned thing and be happy to imitate me by dropping something and yelling “God DAMN it!” or imitate Joe by adding Cajun spices and Tabasco sauce to everything, including brownie mix without any feelings on what expectations her gender seems to require?

Of course, as I ponder this, I continue my search for just the right and perfect princess wallpaper border for her room. I am nothing if not ironical.

Ok - Isn't this just a non-drinking version of "I Never"? Hee. I'll play.

Rules:
* Post 3 things you've done that you believe nobody else on your flist has done.
* If anybody responds with "I've done that," add another thing.
* Encourage your friends to paste this into their own journals to list the unique things they've done.

1) Had a long conversation with Todd Bridges about how being a child star without a strong family structure caused his downfall and how difficult it is to come back from the negativity.

2) Walked to the top of the first hill on the Magnum XL-200 at Cedar Point in Ohio. Here's a shot of the first hill:


Edited to add new non-screen-stretch pic!

3) Got a tatoo with my mother - and she paid.

http://www.quiztron.com/tests/goddess_lurks_in_sou_quiz_22388.htm Which Goddess lurks in your soul?

My Results:


[url=http://www.quiztron.com/tests/goddess_lurks_in_sou_quiz_22388.htm][img]http://www.make-a-quiz.com/quiz_images/full_529103809.jpg[/img][/url]


Demeter

You are a true earth warrior! Demeter is the Greek Goddess of the fields, grain and harvest and inhabits those souls who long to be a part of the green. You have a special connection with plants and care deeply for the Earth. You tend to be motherly and protective of those that are in your care and are not above severe aggression when one of your charges is harmed or threatened.

Dearest b.org -

Why must thou forsake me and deny me access??

From an article Joe found called "The 6 Cutest Animals That Can Still Destroy You":

Bottlenose Dolphin: They can talk. They shoot high-pitched chirps and squeaks back and forth, slap their tails in the surf and jump around to let each other know what kind of day they're having. This is the only animal in the world that Americans feel proud of not eating. This is fucking Flipper here, every third girl you met in college had at least one tattooed somewhere on her body.

Yes, that sound is me banging my head on my desk and reaching for the tatoo removal cream.

Am still in hard core F2F Withdrawl/Hangover, which is the fifth stage of F2F-ing.

The first four being: Preparing, Travelling, Greeting, and Prom.

Have also entered the sixth stage of F2Fing which is Second Guessing All Actions and Repercussions Thereof.

I expect the seventh and final stage of Acceptance will happen about 3 months after the final pictures are posted.

I had an interesting thought/argument about/to churches who don't allow certain "undesireables" to worship based on whatever it is the church thinks God doesn't like:

If you don't tell your friends or family who they can or can not have in their houses, how dare you tell someone they aren't welcome in God's House?

I'm having an ugly day. My complexion is all wonky, I'm bloated, my hairdryer died, I don't like my bangs anymore, my eyebrows need waxing, and could this haircolor be anymore mousy?

I swear to God, the enitre world-wide staff of Sephora couldn't help me right now.

AND - I get to meet my brother's new skinny, beautiful girlfriend tonight.

Bleh bleh bleh.

1) Turned in first scholarship application, complete with awesome rec from orontology Thanks, babe.
2) Picked up rec letter from on former prof.
3) Paid rent to Ex-Boss.

Yay accomplishments!

Joe and I had a date night and went to see Indy 4. ( I have one question: )

Em's all registered for pre-school for fall.

Where'd my baby go???

Had a miserable night. Couldn't get to sleep and when I finaaly did, I was plagued with horrible dreams involving me being whacked-out manic and my family tricking me into hospitalization half-naked. When I finally got back to sleep after that one, had another one where a former schoolmate of mine told me that she had just seen Emeline get killed. It was almost enough for me to stay home and just snuggle her. Freaked me out but good. I think all told, I got about 4 hours of sleep, so I'll be mainlining coffee until I'm shaking.

Of course, this brought up all sorts of shit in my head and led to Joe asking if I'm going back on my meds as soon as the new benes kick in to which the answer is HELL TO THE YES.

I hate my brane sometimes.

Joe has a permanent job, I start my new dream job on Thursday, and we have our housing situation solved.

Le Conats will be moving into my grandparents old house in Ypsi ownship at the end of August. There is lots to be done this summer to have it move-in ready, so I might be calling upon local people to help with painting, light construction like tiling, etc, and then, at the end of August, the actual move. I'm very grateful to my Uncle Kim who has made it possible for this to happen. We will be there for at least two years and I'm very excited about it. Also, we will be on the lookout for furniture and whotnot others might want to get rid of.

It feels good to have so many good things happening after a year of ups and downs.

Thanks to all of you for your support and love. Truly.

I might even stop bitching about things!!

22. The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood
23. The Bean Trees - Barbara Kingsolver

Currently Reading: The Complete Works of Truman Capote

I got the job I inerviewed for a couple of weeks ago.

It pays mre and even has benefits.

Thank you guys so much for your love and job~~ma.

MWAH!!

I got a virtual baby llama!!!

Which, as you may or may not know, belong to the scientific Family of Camelids, which makes it the PERFECT present for me!!!

THANK YOUFOR MY CAMELID!!!

It could be ten, but then again, I can't remember half an hour since a quarter to four.
Throw on your clothes, the second side of Surfer Rosa, and you leave me with my jaw on the floor.

Hey!
Just when you think you're in control,
just when you think you've got a hold,
just when you get on a roll,
Oh here it goes, here it goes, here it goes again.
Oh, here it goes again.
I should have known,
should have known,
should have known again,
But here it goes again.
Oh, here it goes again.

It starts out easy, something simple, something sleazy, something inching past the edge of reserve.
Now through the lines of the cheap venetian blinds your car is pulling off of the curb.

Hey!
Just when you think you're in control,
just when you think you've got a hold,
just when you get on a roll,
Oh, here it goes, here it goes, here it goes again.
Oh, here it goes again.
I should have known, should have known,
should have known again,
but here it goes again.
Oh, here it goes.
Oh, here it goes.
Oh, here it goes again.
Oh, here it goes again.
Oh oh
Oh, here it goes.
Yeah, oh here it goes again.
Hey hey
Oh, here it goes.
All right!

I guess there's got to be a break in the monotony, but Jesus, when it rains how it pours.
Throw on your clothes, the second side of Surfer Rosa, and you leave me, yeah, you leave me.

Oh, here it goes, here it goes, here it goes again.
Oh here it goes again.
I should have known, should have known,
should have known again,
but here it goes again.
Oh, here it goes, here it goes.
Oh here it goes again.
I should have known, should have known,
but here it goes again.
Oh here it, Oh here it, Oh here it, Oh here it, Oh here it goes
I should have, I should have, I should have, I should have, I should have known
Oh, here it goes, here it goes, here it goes again.
Oh here it goes again.
Oh, here it goes again.

I got fired this morning.

On our way home tonight, we were driving down the main drag that our road empties out onto. We were about 5 miles from home. Joe was driving and I happened to look up when I heard him say, "Shit." Not "Shit" like we're gonna crash, but a more quiet "Shit". I looked out the windshield and saw a black bag on the center line. Except, it wasn't a black bag. It was a black cat, who had obviously been hit. He couldn't get away - his front legs kept trying desperately to run, but his hind legs would just flop uselessly. I yelled at Joe to pull over while he was already pulling over and he jumped out of the car and ran out into the road. One car going the opposite direction whizzed past and Joe went into the center to get the kitty. Poor baby hissed and scratched at him, but Joe got a hold of him and picked him up. A woman behind us had stopped and asked if she could do anything. Joe said no, did she know where the nearest shelter was? Being from this part of town, I knew that the intersection we were at was the one that leads to the Humane Society. I yelled out the window I knew where it was and Joe got back in the passenger seat, we turned right and hauled ass.

It's about 5 miles down the stupid dirt road and Joe just kept scritching him and talking to him and I promised him if he made it, we'd take him home with us. But, about 400 feet from the front door of the Humane Society, kitty had decided enough was enough (and chances are, his back was most likely broken and he would have been euthanized anyway) and went peacefully to sleep and died in Joe's lap.

We took him into the vet's office and that's when I lost it - just bawling and sobbing, trying to tell them what happened. They got a towel and took him and thanked us for bringing him in. They gave me tissues and we left. I cried the whole way home. I'm still tearing up.

I know he died in a much better place with someone scritching him and petting him and loving him for just those few minutes, which is better than scared and alone in the middle of a street or on a stainless steel table, but ... well, you know.

VOTE:

Take Em to Madison with us or have a long weekend to ourselves?

Pro: Get new awesome Scola pic, See lots of Buffistas.

Con: 12+ hours in car with 3 year old.